… also known as Sharon Bakar’s writing course for beginners that led to me finding myself, almost, something like that, slowly getting there, some day.

This be Sharon Bakar.

In my previous post, I shared how Tristen, a tarot card reader brought me down to earth in regards to my half-baked literary aspirations. He also advised me to seek out a teacher to guide me in my writing. If I did that, my path in life could be more defined and ‘help’ would be given along the journey.

I sat on this for a long time. Too sad to do anything, for my ego was bruised, my so-called skills put to doubt. I questioned my abilities, my existence, my role and purpose in this life, universe, everything. I pondered the need to be productive; why we must be useful to society, or be useful at all!

Personal demons, if you will.

Somewhere in between, I had a conversation with my friend LL about writing courses. She came across one, and e-mailed me the link to ‘Creative Writing For Beginners’.

But at that time, I felt that I was above a beginner’s class as I’d been doing *this* for a while. Also with the Internet, I felt that any Tom Dick and Harry could Google and get started on writing!

THEN….. with age, both my inflated ego and I mellowed down. Hello 30s! It stamped out all the fire of youthful indignation; in its place, a humbled person in search of new knowledge.

I revisited LL’s e-mail, really going through it this time. Hey wait a minute, that writing course was conducted by Sharon Bakar. Sharon Bakar! Literally a literary legend in Malaysia, Sharon is a lecturer – she taught my sister at college – as well as a writer, an editor and a publisher.

Once I received the course details, I KNEW that I HAD TO take this class. Can you imagine, I was EXCITED at just reading the modules! I signed up, paid up and waited for my turn to learn!

And immediately after the writing course, I diligently sat myself down to complete a bestseller!

…. RIGHTTTT, that didn’t happen. I’m not sure if it ever will, but you know what? I’m not hung up on it anymore.

Instead, I learned to write freely. To trust myself to let go. Here imagination, run wild! There was no judgment, no fear of sentence structure nor grammar mistakes, how liberating!

To read aloud, and listen to others who read out loud. THIS was empowering, to see people paying attention to what I created. To accept both compliments and criticism, for one does not come without the other.

Sharon was a most giving teacher. Patient, engaging and warm. I found it encouraging that she was so passionate about new writers, her enthusiasm rubbed off on us.

Sure, you could get some same stuff on-line or in books. BUT I can tell you this: I finally understand and appreciate the importance of going through a writing course under the tutelage of a teacher. You also get real-life insights, guidance, empathy and years of experience, and those are gems that cannot be obtained nor translated from books.

I was also surrounded by talented and generous course mates. We learned from each other’s strengths and weaknesses, and were mutually inspired by the raw possibilities in the room.

This camaraderie turned out to be my most important takeaway from the course. It was a strange relief to know that I was not alone, that there are others like me wanting to improve themselves, making this attempt to be better.

Of course, my experience at this writing course may not mirror yours. But we pick up things different, and everyone has their own journey, their own stories to tell.

Thank you so much Sharon. You and your presence opened my eyes to possibilities. Also, mega shoutout to Chakra, Keh Len, Thean Hui and Meena!

So, am I better at writing now? I don’t know! Personally I don’t feel nor see any difference.

I still do not fully know what I want to write. To be honest with you, I have not been keeping up with my daily writing. Bad Suanie.

BUT I feel better about writing and being able to write, if that makes sense to you. No longer do I have this weight on my shoulders to write books, short stories, blog posts or anything at all. With that pressure lifted, I feel that I am at liberty to do whatever I want, even write!

I’m fine with not being really good nor talented, and it’s okayyyyy!

So yes, it is an on-going discovery, and I am enjoying the journey at my own pace.

And yes, my path did clear for me. A few months later, an opportunity came knocking and soon, I was on a different path in life. More on that next time, maybe. Or not!

See what I did there? I don’t have the self-inflicted pressure to tell you, na na na na na na na! 🙂