I had a most vivid dream early this morning. It involves me, Jason Mraz, a baby and blended avocados. Can’t really tell you the details because…
1) I guess it involves me being head over heels with Jason Mraz, and that itself is somewhat embarrassing
2) I really don’t want a baby of my own, unless it’s with Jason Mraz. Since that is not likely to happen this lifetime or the next, I don’t want my mom who reads my blog to go…
3) “YOU SUBCONSCIOUSLY WANT A BABY! BUT FIRST YOU SUBCONSCIOUSLY WANT A HUSBAND WHICH MEANS YOU SUBCONSCIOUSLY WANT A BOYFRIEND!”, because…
4) Too many of my high school friends are getting married and I made the mistake of telling her who’s who getting hitched and invited me to their wedding dinners.
Speaking of which, I attended my high school mate LL’s wedding dinner in BP last weekend.
Me with the beautiful bride
It was lovely meeting up with my high school mates, some of them whom I met not long ago during our 10th year reunion in May, and some whom I have not seen since 1998. It didn’t make me feel like getting married.
Met a friend’s husband for the first time. Didn’t make me feel like getting married. Another friend told me that Irene, whose engagement dinner I attended two years ago might be holding her wedding banquet soon. Didn’t make me feel like getting married. A cousin revealed that her boyfriend proposed and showed me her engagement ring. Didn’t make me feel like getting married. Was chatting with minishorts on GTalk for a bit this morning and she talked about her upcoming wedding plans. Didn’t make me feel like getting married. Am attending Dr Vagus‘ wedding dinner this weekend. I doubt that would make me feel like getting married.
Since statutory declarations are all the rage now, I think I’ll make one ala Gier.
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I, Suanie of Suanie.net… do solemnly and sincerely declare as follows:-
1. I am of non-debatable sound mind and relatively good health, and am prone to pre and post-menstrual syndrome as and when my ovaries decide to release an egg which will pass through my fallopian tubes to my uterus very much unfertilised.
2. Despite my constant war of words with Ryan and his constant abuse of my physical being, I love him very much.
3. Even though my tolerance of children has significantly increased since my sister gave birth to Ryan, I still do not enjoy being around random kids especially in shopping malls. I will never be a kindergarten teacher.
4. When the time comes for me to have my own baby, I’d be happily married to either Jason Mraz, John Mayer or a significantly loaded guy who is not too shabby-looking and in possession of an intelligent and imaginative mind as well as a poetic soul. My Jason Mraz, John Mayer or a significantly loaded guy who is not too shabby-looking and in possession of an intelligent and imaginative mind as well as a poetic soul will be able to tell the difference between “your” and “you’re”.
5. He will also have a yacht.
6. When my friends get married or have plans to get married, I feel happy for them. That happiness for other people’s happiness does not translate to nor is equal to me wanting to get married myself.
7. All of the above was not written in a defensive mode, and is not a sly reverse psychology gesture in light of my current status as a single female.
8. Item no. 7 was not written in a defensive mode in anticipation of possible allegations of me writing everything above in a defensive mode, and was not a sly reverse psychology gesture from me to counter possible allegations of me employing a sly reverse psychology gesture upon myself and those around me.
9. Ditto.
10. The purpose of this statutory declaration is to:
10.1 State my firm and unwavering opinion that some 27-years old single females such as myself are not in a rush to tie the knot.
10.2 Express my concern that my mother’s mind is fettered with ideas that I am secretly wanting to get married because I happened to mention to her and my siblings that some of my friends are to be wed in the near future.
10.3 Emphasize the fact that I have no such existing ideas and notions in my head, unless she is willing to sponsor me a ticket to the Singapore Festival in August where Jason Mraz will be playing and will spot me among thousands of people in the crowd and fall in love with me instantly and bring me to the States with him and marry me at a simple ceremony where “I’m Yours” is on repeat in the background.
11. And I make this solemn declaration conscientiously believing the same be true and by virtue of the provisions of the Statutory Declaration Act 1960.
SUBSCRIBED and SOLEMNLY DECLARED by the abovenamed SUANIE at HER DESK in the State of Selangor this day of 04 JULY 2008 before THE HUNDREDS OF READERS ON HER BLOG.
