13 signs the general elections are near
Was sending Erna home after a yum-char session. The road directly outside her place (where I used to live) was beautifully paved over. It was the first time in so many years that I’ve seen that road without it being uneven or not filled with potholes. My immediate thought was… “ELECTIONS KAMBING SOON!!!”
Apparently that was her first thought as well; just one of the more obvious signs that Malaysia’s GE will soon be upon us. How soon is soon? I don’t know… soon enough lah!
So here are 13 signs that the general elections are near… compiled with the help of my sister, Kelvin, James and one ‘psycho killer’ who shall remain anonymous 
(Disclaimer: this post is meant for laughs. Don’t take me too seriously. I can’t tell you the exact date of the upcoming general elections, because usually I am the last to know)
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13 Signs The General Elections Are Near
1. The roads outside your house, or anywhere else within the BN constituency are newly paved over. Various potholes that have been there forever are nicely filled. Roads and streets in Malaysia have not looked so good since 5 years ago.
2. Rumours of elections are rife but the government vehemently denies them, or plays coy.
3. Potential election candidates pop by your house for a cuppa and a friendly chat, accompanied by frenzied media. Most of the time, you would not see them again in real life for the next 5 years.
4. Newspapers go out of their way to publish nation-building articles.
5. The stock exchange heats up for half a year.
6. There are no price increases anywhere, OR the government suddenly reduces the ceiling price of a commodity item.
7. Civil servants get increase in salaries, or hefty bonuses.
8. MCA suddenly holds extra free tai-chi classes at each branch.
9. The Prime Minister and his deputy read from the same script of fairness and unity.
10. Pak Lah sends you a snail mail thanking you for being an awesome Malaysian, and to remind you not to take the country’s peace for granted.
11. Printing suppliers for T-shirts, badges, caps and umbrellas are swamped with hush hush orders.
12. You can’t buy a single bloody ticket in advance to balik kampung because bus companies suddenly get massive bookings on that date.
13. When the PM is in the country for more than 1 week at a stretch… voila!!!
For more, check the Comments 
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Wow, not bad, should compile more, say 50 signs as we’re celebrating 50 years of nationhood!
LMAO
More signs elections are coming:
14. When Dato’ Siti is in the studios to sing a new theme to follow up such classy works such as “Cinta IT”
15. When you suddenly see your elected representatives on the LRT, Pudu bus station and AirAsia flights…though you know for the next five years you won’t see them except through the tinted windows of their Proton Perdanas.
16. When UMNO starts to make even more kissy-face with the Sarawak government in secret hopes they’ll be allowed in the state (fat chance)
17. When dodgy-looking mysterious burly men slink around Anwar’s residence and meeting places for opposition meetings or rallies
18. When our YBs suddenly profess an itch for nasi kerabu and spend a lot of time on the East Coast
Actually I used to think that the road paving was to make us rakyat happy. But then, I realised that for the most part, we are actually kind of indifferent about road conditions, unless it is REALLY bad, and that is not so common..
Then, I realised that it was probably to keep the CONTRACTORS happy, so they’d have the pocket money just in time to feel good and vote the right way . They are the ones who matter, not us.
This just came in…
19. Government servants can take five years’ unpaid maternity leave
they’re serious about winning…lol. ditto SK, lets hit the big 50!
20. opposition get extra media coverage… the negative sort.
ALSO the wrong sort of political focus on minute incidents to divert your attention from the other more serious political issues burning at hands!!
LOL at no. 13!
EXTREMELY true !! almost bulls- eye !! haha..
plus this with government servants getting 5 years of upaid leave !!
they are going all out for a win !!
the last one hits the spot!
Heh. Here comes the bastard.
Speaking of general elections, exactly how many bloggers are actually going to go out into the sunlight (or rain, as applicable) to vote? How many are actually registered to vote, in the first place? LOL
Allow me to provide a general tip: The consituency where you will vote is determined by the address in your IC.
If the address in your IC is not the same as your current address, and you couldn’t be arsed travelling to Pontian, Tuaran, Ketambatu or whatever constituency your IC address is located in, then it’s best if you get your IC address changed and update the Election Commission.
lol, so similar to sg elections.
21.When a Menteri comes to a foreign city to talk about what the government has done for the nation to the students studying there and treats them with free food. And not bother about the serious problems bugging the students.Thinking that ayam masak merah shall solve the problem.
LOL, roads are being paved right here in Bintulu as I comment, GE is really coming