Archives for June 2007

it’s friday, so…

Ask me anything. I’ll answer every question I get. Bloggers’ honour[1].


[1] which doesn’t really say much, but someone’s gotta bring integrity back to blogging[2], eh? Heh… ๐Ÿ˜‰
[2] which in reality is not going to be me, but yes, I will still answer every question I get.

i don’t know the name of this meme

Meme stolen from Chen. Not linking her because she didn’t give permission to do so. Well, I didn’t really ask, but anyway…

1. What is more difficult for you: looking into someone’s eyes when you are telling them how you feel, or looking into someone’s eyes when they are telling you how they feel?

It is more difficult for me to look into someone’s eyes when they are telling me how they feel. I am assuming we are referring to a romantic relationship scenario. When it comes to friends, neither poses a problem for me. I may not do it, but that does not mean it poses difficulty for me. Because I could be driving, or something. Need to concentrate on the road ๐Ÿ˜€

2. Think of the last time you were REALLY angry. Why were you angry?

This morning when someone else bought the remaining sambal ikan bilis from my favourite nasi lemak stall. The second last time must have been when I was on the road.

3. You are on a flight from Honolulu to Chicago non-stop. There is a fire in the back of the plane. You get enough time to make ONE phone call. Who would you call?

My sister. Because she is the glue of the family, she will know how to handle my unfortunate death with my family, and I also want her to tell Ryan how much I love him.

4. You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live.

(1) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die?

Why not? I’ll even blog about it. In fact I’ve informed my mother and sister on how I want my funeral to be, and my mother suggested that my corpse be burnt like how they do Kenny Rogers chicken.

(2) What do you do with your remaining days?

Write letters to everyone. Blog everyday. Sort out whatever I have to sort out. Spend time with loved ones. Visit my favourite Buddhist monk, Bhante Sumana. I don’t know. Depends on how sick I am. Most probably will have to rely on some mutli-colour wires and tubes to keep me alive for the remaining month.

(3) Would you be afraid?

Definitely. All the time until a moment when I finally manage to make peace with myself.

5. You can have one of the following two things: trust/love. Which do you choose?

Trust. Only with trust, you can have love. I don’t believe in love before trust. It’s dumb.

6. You are unfaithful to your boyfriend/girlfriend. Do you tell him/her?

Of course not. I’d be a slut, but not stupid.

7. Think of the last person who you know that died. You have the chance to give them 1 hour of life back, but you have to give one year of your life. Do you do it?

Yes. But then, maybe not. I don’t know. Would it have helped her? The last person I know who passed away was a tricky situation. I would have wanted her to reconsider her decision, but I don’t know if that was really her choice, and she wouldn’t have wanted another hour. So yeah, I don’t know.

8. Are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend?

No. I suck.

9. Does love = sex?

Theoretically, no.

10. When was the last time you told someone HONESTLY how you feel?

This morning, during a short meeting with my boss, when I told him that I honestly felt that we should push the dates back for something.

11. What would be harder for you, to tell someone you love them or that you do not love them back?

Telling someone that I don’t love them back, because it is increasingly easier for me to tell people I love that I love them.

12. What do you think would be the hardest thing for you to give up? Why would it be hard to lose?

Food and more food. Because it’s awesome.

13. If you had to go back in time and change one thing, if you HAD to, even if you have “no regrets” what would you change?

I know the exact thing I would change, but I’m not telling ๐Ÿ™‚

14. Imagine. It is a dark night, you are alone, it is raining outside, you hear someone walking around outside your window. WHO do you wish was there with you?

Kuan Kong? LOL! Oh wait, someONE. So it’s a person. Hmm… No one. If something bad should happen, then it should only happen to me only.

15. Would you give a homeless person CPR if they were dying?

If I knew how to do it properly, yes.

16. Are you old fashioned?

Depends on situation. I told my grandmother that I don’t think it was a big deal to be with someone much older than you are. Or was it not getting married at all? Can’t remember. Anyway she got worried out of her wits, and told my mother. Lol. I think kids should be better behaved and have respect for those older than them. Not reverence out of tradition ( I don’t believe in the ‘having eaten more salt than rice’ stuff ) but basic courtesy and respect, which is severely lacking today. So a mix of both, I think.

17. You are holding onto your grandmother’s hand and the hand of a newborn that you do not know as they hang over the edge of a cliff. You have to let one go to save the other which one would it be?

I don’t know. If my grandmother asked me to let her go, I would. If she asked me to save her, I would too. I love my grandmother.

18. Which would you choose, true love with a guarantee of a heart break or have never loved before?

I’ve been through true love with guaranteed heart break ( I think ), and I will do it again.

19. If you could do anything OR wish anything, what would it be?

I wish I have unlimited wishes that would come true.

20.Excluding family love, when was the last time you told someone you loved them?

Kim. Just so I can answer this question.

rela tak rela

Question: When did the Federation of Malaya achieved independence?

Textbook answer: 31 August 1957.

Suanie’s retort: You think? You really think?!?

Forget the NEP’s policies that highly insult and degrade our Bumiputera and puteri. Sometimes I can’t get a goddamn Happy Meal or Starbucks latte without being passed over for a Caucasian standing in line BEHIND me.

Even the said Caucasian would get embarrassed and inform the server that I was there first. Then I would get to order my stuff, without the brilliant and dazzling smile I’d seen reserved for the Caucasian behind me.

See, I don’t need the brilliant and dazzling smile. It’s nice sometimes, but it is not a necessity. If I wanted to see people smiling like Miss Universe all the time, I could easily dress up like a thousand bucks and walk into various expensive hotels and ask crazy shit at the reception. Or I could fly to Bangkok.

I don’t need it because when I was younger, I was a waitress. I understand how fucking difficult it is to keep up your cheery persona for eight or more hours a day. Yes it is compulsory to smile at your customers, but it is understood that you can’t smile like a million bucks all the freaking time. Around here, people wouldn’t think that you are friendly; they would think that you are crazy. I am fine and comfortable with a half-smile but that’s just me.

But being passed over for someone else behind me?! And that someone ALWAYS happens to be a Caucasian?!?!?!?! Man, that just gets on my open pores.

Why is it sometimes more difficult to get service here ( any service, let alone good ) when you have anything but white skin? Bear in mind that I am not against having white skin — erm, it’s dumb to get upset over anything remotely like that. I am just mind-boggled at why ME — the Malaysian who is most likely to spend more in the long run in a particular restaurant or fast-food joint ( because I am not going anywhere ) would be overlooked just because? I am not unfriendly — in fact I always smile to people who provide service, even the toll girls. I am not going to run off without paying. I am not going to tip you but only because we are not in the U.S., and I am already paying for 10% service charge on top of the total bill amount.

So answer me. WHY?!?

( Actually that question was for dramatic purposes. I already know the answer. )

Today’s rant and whine was brought on by something I read last Sunday in The Star. It was an interview with Datuk Zaidon Asmuni, the director-general for RELA, and it seemed mostly a PR move to inform the public of RELA’s role, and to tell what really happened with the Indian national who was remanded at Petaling Street, who turned out to be a crew member of a documentary that was being shot here. Sunday Star, 10 June 207, under FOCUS, page F25. Go search.

According to the article, RELA was formed in 1972 after the May 13 incident. “The Government felt Rela was one way to unite the rakyat alongside Rukun Tetangga and the National Unity Ministry.” So how RELA became appointed and given full power to arrest and remand those suspected of being illegals in Malaysia is beyond me.

Yadda yadda yadda, cut through to bullshit to the third final question Shahanaz Habib threw at Datuk Zaidon.

What about the case of the Indian film crew member RELA detailed detained (thanks Chen) that got the Tourism Minister all riled up?

The Indian crew member was walking through Petaling Street at 9.30 p.m. If it’s a Mat Salleh (Caucasian), it would be easy because we would know he is a tourist for sure. But for others, we have to check. Under the law, all foreigners have to carry their passport or travel document with them all the time. […]

Suanie’s notes and observations:

1. Anyone who has been to Petaling Street at 9.30 p.m. knows that it is the peak hour when the place is bustling with activity. To hint that just because it is a street, it was night hence the implication that it was dark and dangerous and anyone would have cause to be suspicious of ANYONE who was there at that time, is nuts. Then you have NEVER been to Petaling Street so stfu.

Besides I read somewhere that part of the reason they remanded the Indian was because he was wearing slippers. I fail to see the connection.

2. Why is it instant confirmation that every Mat Salleh (Caucasian) is a tourist? Again, I am not against Caucasians or tourists. But Datuk Zaidon seemed to imply that Caucasians in this country are automatically non-suspects when it comes to law-breaking. Sorry all ye tourists from Middle East, Africa, Pakistan, India, Latin America, Japan, China, Taiwan, Korea, and non-Caucasians from every other country. Somehow someway, you must be illegals and must bear the brunt of racial profiling.

3. Based on the interview, the person in a very high position with a team given such power is seemingly a racist. Got to word this properly, else I’d be served with a law suit ๐Ÿ˜‰

4. So no, the British never left.

5. Time for lunch.

monday’s busy beavers

I have a lot of stuff I want to blog about, but at this rate it seems highly unlikely that I’d have the time to write them down.

There was one piece of shitty news that got on my nerves yesterday, but that too will have to wait.

So I have to leave you with a photo with the reason I was back home last weekend.

Suanie and Melissa the bride on her wedding day

Congratulations to you, my dear friend Melissa. I hope everything goes well for you and your husband from now on. BFF.

cars over and over and over again… repeat infinity

When we were little, mom used to rent tapes for us to watch. In the eighties it was Chip ‘n Dale and the assorted Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck cartoons. My first big screen experience was ‘Beauty and the Beast‘ in 1991; it was wonderful.

With that in mind, I have been introducing cartoons to Ryan in hopes that he would have similar memories when he grows up. He is used to watching Animal Planet, Discovery Channel and National Geographic, and he seems to have a distinct liking for animals. My mom and his mom have also been introducing different animals to him — elephants, tigers, lions, rabbits, fish etc.

So one day I thought he would appreciate Finding Nemo, with all the fish in it and all that. FIfteen minutes into the movie, I realised that it was a bit too violent for a nearly 2-year old kid, and switched to Bambi instead. Needless to say, Ryan got bored out of his wits and began jumping around, doing everything but watch the damn movie. An auntie’s good intentions thwarted.

Later on, he seemed to enjoy The Incredibles with a 65% rapt attention span. That is a very good percentage for a hyper active toddler. It also indicated that while he likes animals ( his mother took him to the zoo and he had a heck a good time ), it does not necessarily means that he enjoys watching them in cartoon forms for more than an hour.

So I bought Cars because I liked the movie, and I thought Ryan would like it too.

I was right, and this is a snapshot of him watching Cars on my laptop in my room.

Ryan watches CARS

In fact, I was too damn right. Since then whenever he looks at me, he would demand, “CARSSSS CARSSS CARRRRRRRRSS CARRRSS CARSSs carrsss … ah yii… carssssssssss CARSsssssssss CARRSS yao yao yao yao yao yao yao yao yao CARSSSSSSSS Carss carsss AH YI cars!! yao kan yao kan yao kan yao kan yao kan yao kan yao kan CARSSsssssss !!!!!!!!!!!111111”

( ah yi = auntie; yao = want; yao kan = want to watch )

Now I know every scene, every character, every line, every colour, every anything there is to know about Cars. While HE possibily thinks that it is a movie that goes on forever. And he does not want to watch anything else. No Toy Story, no Lion King, no Monsters Inc, just CARS, CARS and even MORE CARS.

Anyway, here’s a 45 second video clip of Ryan watching Cars.

He better appreciate me when he grows up, that’s all I’m saying.

so pissed off that i forgot to insert a title earlier

I have a bone to pick.

This country is seriously fucked up.

I mean, I’ve known that for the longest time, but I only felt compelled to put it down in words after an incident last night.

We had the shittiest of all shitty weather yesterday — rain, rain, rain and even more rain. It was like a scene out of a bad Hollywood movie with lots of rain and water and Kevin Costner. Come night fall, I was between a state of wanting to be emo due to the excessive rain and exasperation thanks to the fucking rain. Not a healthy place to be, especially if you are a ticking nuclear bomb like me.

Maybe I lied. I am not a ticking anything. But see how all these mental disturbance caused by the weather is causing havoc to my usually warm and sunny personality?

Gotcha again. ANYWAY, I drove to Williams to meet Spongefox last night because the latter had not eaten the whole day. I think he’s one of those folks who store instant noodles by the cartons next to his bed for easy access. Something I used to do when I was not living with my sister.

It was during the short journey when something scared the living breath out of me. Almost anyway, because if I were dead, I wouldn’t be writing all this crap now.

Or maybe you lot would prefer a ghost penning all these words? No doubt it would increase this blog’s popularity by leaps and bounds. Might even get Slashdotted.

Right. The point to this Monday whining. Ghosts. Spirits. Lost souls. Hantu. Lembaga hitam. Jelmaan syaitan.

I hate them all. They are unsettling to whatever’s left of my inner peace.

But even more so, I hate driving at night in the rain along a lonely road and stop at a traffic light to see a giant billboard advertising the latest horror movie being shown in town.

I hate movie distributors who think it’s a good idea to buy prime billboard advertising spaces and install the largest horror movie posters with the sole purpose of scaring every single road user that passes by.

I hate the ad agencies who allow movie distributors who think it’s a good idea to buy prime billboard advertising spaces and install the largest horror movie posters with the sole purpose of scaring every single road user that passes by to have their ways.

But you know what?

I don’t hate them as much as I hate whoever is effing responsible for putting up/ installing the billboards in strategic spots and sell them to ad agencies who allow movie distributors who think it’s a good idea to buy prime billboard advertising spaces and install the largest horror movie posters with the sole purpose of scaring every single road user that passes by to have their ways.

You remember the big ass Ju-On or Grudge movie poster along the LDP?

And you wonder why so many accidents occur throughout the highway. They weren’t driving irresponsibility — they were scared out of their wits and simply lost control of their senses and cars.

But movie posters are not the only culprits.

If you are driving towards the Rothmans roundabout at night, and you turn to go towards SS2, you will see this big ass billboard of a chick advertising some product that I can’t recall to save my life.

Why can’t I remember the name of the product?

Because I was too busy averting my eyes from the ghostly lit-up face of the chick who stares at you as if she was going to possess your body anytime soon so give up your rights or else.

I think I should make it a point to remember the product and the company. Should I be involved in an accident at the roundabout ( but touch wood ) I am so going to fucking sue the pants out of the company leaving them no change to take the bus home.

Dumb fucks.

friday blah

I was in KL the past couple of days to get something done. Suffice to say, I didn’t like it. The city, not the job… well maybe the job just a little ๐Ÿ˜›

KL beats PJ when it comes to pubs and clubs ANYTIME ( I am developing an affection for Bar Ceylon as it is ). KL has the BEST siu yok my family and I ever had, KL has a functioning bus station which is useful if you do not wish to drive back home ( Johor for me ), and… that’s about it. Everything else, I can easily get in PJ. I don’t even need to go to Low Yat for tech stuff — Computer War and Digital Mall serve my purposes just fine.

It just that the journey gets to me. Add in the traffic jam and crazy motorcyclists ( especially along Jalan Sultan Ismail near Kg Baru ), I always end up with a headache if I have to go to KL during the day. I get irritated. I get pissed off. I get so fucking bored out of my mind especially if someone is in Myanmar and can’t accompany me for lunch at KLCC. The other two people I know working in the Golden Triangle were also busy leading their own lives and couldn’t meet up. So what’s a girl to do but to drink a couple of lonely beers while waiting for an appointment scheduled for 2 hours later… ๐Ÿ™

So I have a new-found respect for those who trudge the daily route to work. Okay maybe definitely no trudging involved but you get the idea. To my sister and brother-in-law who work along the two busiest roads in KL, I salute you.

Just felt like whining a little. After all it’s not as if anything spectacularly exciting happened since I last updated this blog. Oh yeah, no joy for Lina Joy. But you can talk about it over at Xpyre’s — he’s better at these kind of stuff than me.

Over at a certain embassy, I was fuming at their ridiculous operating hours. Then I finally got the stuff done and was in the elevator going to the car park when a man stepped in. Nice, jolly-looking middle-age chap. You know when you are in an elevator and if there are three or more people in it, you try to keep your distance to safeguard your personal space? Well sometimes when there are only me and another person, and I am in the mood, I try to catch the other person’s eye to begin a conversation. I am friendly like that ๐Ÿ˜‰

Besides uncomfortable silence between two person in a restricted area for even less than 10 seconds is still uncomfortable. If the other person is looking everywhere else but you, then you know when to keep your mouth shut and continue to dwell in your personal space.

But this chap looked at me and smiled. He looked serene and happy. He was holding 3 or 4 passports, presumably with the visas he wanted.

“Final burden in my life,” he said.
“Oh when are you going?”
“Next month. My whole family is going.”
“Well, good luck ๐Ÿ™‚ ”
“Thank you!”

I’ve been thinking of that encounter for a couple days now. I guess I am slightly jealous that some people know what they want in their lives, and go for it. And also that they know exactly where they can get that peace of mind.

But then… some things I don’t know well, or don’t know at all. I am pretty certain that I wouldn’t be able to get it even if I go to Bodh Gaya or Kusinara. And I envy those who can.