Archives for May 2007

Last month, Don Imus, an American shock jock was fired by CBS and MSNBC. He had called members of a university’s women basketball team ‘nappy-headed hos‘, and it was the subsequent almost nationwide public outrage that got him the sack (I don’t think corporate America would give a shit if no one had protested).

The basketball team were hurt by his remarks, saying that it had “stolen a moment of pure grace” from the team. While I believe that no one but yourself can make you feel bad about yourself (and that no one else would believe the team members are really nappy-headed hos), the stream of righteousness that followed was interesting to see. Don’t quote me but I believe that there is a great divide between conservative and liberal Americans; while some people didn’t think it was worthy of several days of headlines, others were more than offended that Imus issued an apology (that didn’t help his case).

But that is America, where porn is a booming industry, where almost everyone knows their free speech and other constitutional rights, where the ruling government is (almost) changed every 4 years, where social welfare benefits more immigrants than their own poor people, where Bush used ‘God’ to help him in his WMD search (on our side, we have Mr. Vellu using God as an excuse for highway mishaps)… I guess MadHaiku would be better at this than me, i.e. summarising America.

What has it got to do with us? Nothing whatsoever. Because Members of Parliament who associate leaking roof tops due to poor workmanship and maintenance with the female menstrual cycles won’t apologise, won’t retract, won’t think what they said was highly inappropriate or wrong, let alone get fired. Not even with the nation fuming at their ‘unparliamentary’ words. Not even when there is video evidence to counter their claims of ‘misquotation’. And not even when one of the MPs in question has a standing history of saying downright stupid, offensive and various other ‘unparliamentary’ stuff.

This is not an issue about race. It is not even about political views and leanings. Maybe it is about how parliament sessions are conducted — just go search on YouTube and you can get a glimpse of how they behave and react; not just MPs from the ruling government but also the opposition.

All these MPs were (supposedly) elected by the people. I think the two offending MPs are not just insulting men, women and children, but also the constituencies they represent. If Datuk Shahrizat Abdul Jalil doesn’t fight on this issue, I don’t see the point of her remaining on the cabinet. But why do I have a sinking feeling that nothing would be done about this, and that life would go on and people will soon forget?

Everything should just go my way. At least I would provide free beer for all, and the world would be happy once more.

Sometimes I wonder why parliament sessions are still on-going. After all it’s not like they really try to discuss and solve problems plaguing the country. Even high school debates are far more civilised and thought-provoking than what happens during the parliament sessions.

Based on recent history, respective MPs will only get their butts moving after a directive by the Prime Minister. So why not let the PM be the sole dictator and say,

“You here, Works Minister, I don’t like the fact that potholes appear everywhere all the friggin’ time, do something by next Friday or else!”
“You again Works Minister, why are lucrative government contracts being given to contractors who use poor materials and even poorer workmanship that my ruling abode is bursting all over? Same deadline, or else!”
“Hey Education Minister, just because your dad was awesome doesn’t mean that you can bask in the memory of his name and contributions and do a piss poor job at what you are doing. Our education system is a joke. Do something about it NOW and stop waving that bloody keris in my face.”
“OMG TRANSPORT MINISTER WTF HAVE YOU BEEN DOING OMG!!!!!”
“You really thought the EOM was a brilliant idea, Tourism Minister? Why didn’t you use your judgment and stop me before I sign the dotted lines for work on it to commence? And not all bloggers are liars, you noob; this blogger Suanie is putting words in my mouth that I should utter before the country gets worse than it already is, and not expecting any monetary returns whatsoever. I should thank and honour her as it is.”

Unfortunately constructive criticism falls on deaf ears in this country. Mainstream media would never publish my thoughts as they are on their print or on-line material. The only consolation I get is that I do get to write these things on Monsterblog, fully well aware that the boys in power (i.e. Putrajaya) check it everyday (and wondering when we’d get slapped for the things we’d written and published there), or go running to Jeff Ooi, the daddy of self-righteousness. Or I could just go to the movies and watch Spiderman 3 and not give two flying fucks about what goes on in the country. After all despite my citizenship I’ve been often reminded to ‘tak suka, balik negeri Cina’ just because I was born a Chinese. So even though my grandparents, my extended family, my parents, my siblings and I were born in Malaysia, that was not enough to make us Malaysians. Not even when some of my family members went through WW2, decentralisation, May 13th, rise of 5 prime ministers and retirement of 4, 49 years of Merdeka, 1997 Asian stock market crisis etc with the rest of Malaya/ Malaysia. C’est la vie, eh? Sorry, itulah kehidupan.

Look, fine, I am whining maybe just a little. I am a whiny person; I whine when they make my Nescafe ais kurang manis as sweet as PDA, I whine when my laptop breaks down, I whine when stuck in a traffic jam, I basically whine when things don’t go my way. So before anyone goes accusing me of being an ungrateful tak sedar diri whiner, let me tell you this: I AM a whiner. That much I’d admit to. But ungrateful and tak sedar diri? Purlease, tengoklah cermin dahulu sebelum menuduh sebarangan. Bak kata pepatah, bila kita menuding satu jari pada orang, kita sebenarnya menuding empat jari pada diri kita sendiri. Word.

Bleh, this is getting a bit long. I’ll continue part 2 during lunch.