Archives for May 2007

things you learn from living with a baby

1. Boundaries

Ryan draws

Never let a baby armed with a pen draw anything on your bed, even if you’d supplied him with a writing pad with many many pages. Somehow the pen would find a way to leave its mark on your bed sheet.

2. Extravagance

Ryan in a car

Until they reach a certain age, do not insert coins into the kiddie ride. They seem happy enough to play in a non-moving kiddie ride. Once you put in RM1, they would try their best to scramble out and run away.

3. Overestimation

Ryan asleep

If you are going to take a toddler that weighs more than 10kg out for more than a couple of hours, it is more than advisable to bring the stroller. Unless you are Sazali Samad.

4. Life lessons

Ryan and beer

Start ’em young.

5. Cultivate friendships

Ryan and FA-2

Make sure you get him to be friends with YOUR friends. That way, when you bring him out and need to concentrate on your dinner or go to the loo or whatever, your friends will be willing to look after him for a while.

Ryan and FA

Never hurt to have more friends πŸ™‚

this is not a rant part 2

Last month, Don Imus, an American shock jock was fired by CBS and MSNBC. He had called members of a university’s women basketball team ‘nappy-headed hos‘, and it was the subsequent almost nationwide public outrage that got him the sack (I don’t think corporate America would give a shit if no one had protested).

The basketball team were hurt by his remarks, saying that it had “stolen a moment of pure grace” from the team. While I believe that no one but yourself can make you feel bad about yourself (and that no one else would believe the team members are really nappy-headed hos), the stream of righteousness that followed was interesting to see. Don’t quote me but I believe that there is a great divide between conservative and liberal Americans; while some people didn’t think it was worthy of several days of headlines, others were more than offended that Imus issued an apology (that didn’t help his case).

But that is America, where porn is a booming industry, where almost everyone knows their free speech and other constitutional rights, where the ruling government is (almost) changed every 4 years, where social welfare benefits more immigrants than their own poor people, where Bush used ‘God’ to help him in his WMD search (on our side, we have Mr. Vellu using God as an excuse for highway mishaps)… I guess MadHaiku would be better at this than me, i.e. summarising America.

What has it got to do with us? Nothing whatsoever. Because Members of Parliament who associate leaking roof tops due to poor workmanship and maintenance with the female menstrual cycles won’t apologise, won’t retract, won’t think what they said was highly inappropriate or wrong, let alone get fired. Not even with the nation fuming at their ‘unparliamentary’ words. Not even when there is video evidence to counter their claims of ‘misquotation’. And not even when one of the MPs in question has a standing history of saying downright stupid, offensive and various other ‘unparliamentary’ stuff.

This is not an issue about race. It is not even about political views and leanings. Maybe it is about how parliament sessions are conducted — just go search on YouTube and you can get a glimpse of how they behave and react; not just MPs from the ruling government but also the opposition.

All these MPs were (supposedly) elected by the people. I think the two offending MPs are not just insulting men, women and children, but also the constituencies they represent. If Datuk Shahrizat Abdul Jalil doesn’t fight on this issue, I don’t see the point of her remaining on the cabinet. But why do I have a sinking feeling that nothing would be done about this, and that life would go on and people will soon forget?

Everything should just go my way. At least I would provide free beer for all, and the world would be happy once more.

this is not a rant part 1

Sometimes I wonder why parliament sessions are still on-going. After all it’s not like they really try to discuss and solve problems plaguing the country. Even high school debates are far more civilised and thought-provoking than what happens during the parliament sessions.

Based on recent history, respective MPs will only get their butts moving after a directive by the Prime Minister. So why not let the PM be the sole dictator and say,

“You here, Works Minister, I don’t like the fact that potholes appear everywhere all the friggin’ time, do something by next Friday or else!”
“You again Works Minister, why are lucrative government contracts being given to contractors who use poor materials and even poorer workmanship that my ruling abode is bursting all over? Same deadline, or else!”
“Hey Education Minister, just because your dad was awesome doesn’t mean that you can bask in the memory of his name and contributions and do a piss poor job at what you are doing. Our education system is a joke. Do something about it NOW and stop waving that bloody keris in my face.”
“OMG TRANSPORT MINISTER WTF HAVE YOU BEEN DOING OMG!!!!!”
“You really thought the EOM was a brilliant idea, Tourism Minister? Why didn’t you use your judgment and stop me before I sign the dotted lines for work on it to commence? And not all bloggers are liars, you noob; this blogger Suanie is putting words in my mouth that I should utter before the country gets worse than it already is, and not expecting any monetary returns whatsoever. I should thank and honour her as it is.”

Unfortunately constructive criticism falls on deaf ears in this country. Mainstream media would never publish my thoughts as they are on their print or on-line material. The only consolation I get is that I do get to write these things on Monsterblog, fully well aware that the boys in power (i.e. Putrajaya) check it everyday (and wondering when we’d get slapped for the things we’d written and published there), or go running to Jeff Ooi, the daddy of self-righteousness. Or I could just go to the movies and watch Spiderman 3 and not give two flying fucks about what goes on in the country. After all despite my citizenship I’ve been often reminded to ‘tak suka, balik negeri Cina’ just because I was born a Chinese. So even though my grandparents, my extended family, my parents, my siblings and I were born in Malaysia, that was not enough to make us Malaysians. Not even when some of my family members went through WW2, decentralisation, May 13th, rise of 5 prime ministers and retirement of 4, 49 years of Merdeka, 1997 Asian stock market crisis etc with the rest of Malaya/ Malaysia. C’est la vie, eh? Sorry, itulah kehidupan.

Look, fine, I am whining maybe just a little. I am a whiny person; I whine when they make my Nescafe ais kurang manis as sweet as PDA, I whine when my laptop breaks down, I whine when stuck in a traffic jam, I basically whine when things don’t go my way. So before anyone goes accusing me of being an ungrateful tak sedar diri whiner, let me tell you this: I AM a whiner. That much I’d admit to. But ungrateful and tak sedar diri? Purlease, tengoklah cermin dahulu sebelum menuduh sebarangan. Bak kata pepatah, bila kita menuding satu jari pada orang, kita sebenarnya menuding empat jari pada diri kita sendiri. Word.

Bleh, this is getting a bit long. I’ll continue part 2 during lunch.

rum jungle fun and pix

I don’t know, I’m not just a clubbing/ party person anymore. When I first came to KL a few years ago, I used to go out with J&J and my sisters all the friggin’ time. At least 3 nights a week for more than a year? That was then, this is now. These days I’d rather stay at home and play RotMK (craps, now you all know what I do at home!). Even if we go drinking, I’d prefer some place cheap and not so noisy (i.e. Bar Ceylon).

Actually the present me reminds me of Jaime back then. She used to want to go to pubs and have a quiet beer while chatting with friends. I used to think that was the most boring thing to do. I mean, you are out! Let’s go clubbing, paint the town red hot chili red, give me the loud booming music DUM DUM DUM DUM DUM!

Nowadays I have better music in my storage. The last time I went to a clubbing joint was during Faieza‘s birthday where we met the cheapskate. Last week, AdrianPinoy sent out a mass e-mail asking us to go out, and for some reason I felt like going out, so on Saturday night we went to Rum Jungle.

I mean, the reason this is so bloggable is because I probably won’t go clubbing again for the next few months. Plus AdrianPinoy took some photos, and I want to update my blog πŸ˜›

Rum Jungle on a Saturday night
This used to be enjoyable; now I get slightly claustrophobic

Back in the days, I used to like RJ because they always had awesome bands. Turns out they still do! The night we went, there was this really awesome African band; they sang all songs of all languages! Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, Zainal Abidin’s Hijau (which sounds eerily similar to Bob Marley’s No Woman No Cry) and a Beyond tune. Awesome beyond words!

Adrian and Claire
AdrianPinoy and Clairebear posing with the band at work

We thought the keyboardist was the most awesome of all; he was a really good singer, and basically quite fun lah!

Suanie and Fireangel with a band member
So we camwhored with him lor

After the band were done, a couple of dancers went up an elevated platform and started to move their bodies and to feed people vodka shots. The chick in the photo below was rather hot (in the dark) and could really move.

Dancer feeding vodka
VK getting vodka-ed

But one thing I dislike about most general clubs, applicable to Beach and Thai clubs and Rum Jungle. After 12 or 1 a.m. they would start to spin really horrible and out-of-date trance tracks. Dudes, I can do a lot better on Winamp.

By the way, what happened to Bliss @ 12SI? What happened to 12SI in general?? Bliss used to be my favourite club because they played really good house numbers. You could also see Chef Wan in his tight red top and sunglasses moving his booty πŸ˜›

Anyway, here’s half us lot…

Rum Jungle semi-group photo
And one for the camera…

My hair looked like a train wreck in that one. Whatever πŸ˜›

Hah! This post is written like a kid from a small town with a computer and Internet connection let loose in the big city πŸ˜› WHATEVER!!!!!!

something about the weekend

Mom and Dad came up for the weekend. The moment I walked into the house, mom was in a flurry to show me something. Tak jadi, but turned out that she was talking to dad about his handkerchiefs. He was using a rather tattered one and mom wanted to buy him some new hankies. He refused and said, “Suan bought me this one when she was in high school.”

I was so touched; didn’t know my dad was the rather sentimental sort. Took me back to the days when we were cracking our heads wondering what to get for dad for his birthday/ Father’s Day with our limited spending money. I remember getting him a few rounds of hankies, and when my sisters were older they started to buy him shirts and T-shirts (“must have pockets one, if not dad won’t wear it!”).

I love my folks.

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We had dinner at Magic Wok in Damansara Jaya. Brother-in-law bought one of the Chinese set dinner thing for Mothers’ Day. There were 8 of us, but the food presented could easily fit 12 – 14! You know the second course is always the soup, right? Normally at a Chinese wedding dinner, everyone would be served a bowl of soup, and there would be a little bit leftover for those who wants it. Well, our soup portion was so huge that it could easily fill 20 bowls.

The portions were just as huge for every other course. Doggy bagged most of it.

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Missed gym on Friday because either the alarm didn’t work or I switched it off. So I went on Saturday afternoon. The peps who work there were so enthusiastic to help me use the machines etc. After my 15 mins of treadmill, the chick asked me to join the body pump class, and to do 10 mins on the elliptical.

I lasted 1 minute on that thing and decided not to kill myself that day, and proceeded to do 15 minutes of cycling. Later at night, I was telling FA about how the elliptical nearly murdered me and she went, “BUT IT’S GOOD FOR YOU SUAN!!!!!!”

It brought me back to my childhood days when I protested over the cod liver oil and snake bile liquid and my dad went, “IT’S GOOD FOR YOU SHUT UP AND DRINK IT!!!”

Of course he didn’t say that. At most he glared at me and went ‘tsk’ but the effect was the same.

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Introducing Ryan, my nephew, the love of my mother’s life πŸ™‚

Ryan

2nd day at gym and other stuff

Got woken up at nearly 6 a.m. by a loud thunder clap. Couldn’t go back to sleep but not willing to really wake up, so rolled about bed for an hour trying (unsuccessfully) to catch a few winks. Reached gym at 7.30 a.m., had my measurements taken, did 15 minutes treadmill and almost 15 minutes of cycling. Was about to take a shower when the gym chick rushed in to tell me that I was not done with my programme.

“What programme?”
“Oh the FULL body fat reduction programme.”

Apparently they already set up a list of things I should do — 15 minutes of treadmill, 15 minutes of cycling and another 15 minutes of using some other machines. So the first week I should do no less than 45 minutes of sweaty stuff. By the second week, I should add another 5 minutes to both treadmill and cycling.

Very nice and sweet of them. But this shit is tough. At the end of the 10th minute of cycling today, my legs are begging me to stop, STOP THIS MADNESS OMG YOU ARE PERFECT, YOU SHOULDN’T GIVE A SHIT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK ABOUT YOU, YOU DON’T NEED TO TORTURE YOURSELF LIKE THIS STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111

So, back to gym on Friday.

While putting my stuff into the locker, a young-looking middle-aged lady came in and started complaining about the lack of lockers bla bla bla. I was rather puzzled because there were plainly so many unused lockers in sight, but I guess she only wanted the ones at arm’s reach. She started to make conversation, going on about how we should keep everything, including shoes inside the locker because apparently someone else’s shoes were stolen while she was in the shower.

“Must keep everything locked one you know. That stolen shoes must have been taken by people who are not like you and me. This gym got other races one… They must have taken it lor… People like you and me won’t take other people’s shoes one… you know lah, they not Chinese is like that one… last time ar, my daughter used to put her music player and her mobile phone out like that when she showers… I was like, haiyohhhhh but luckily no one ever take. I scolded her you know!! Cannot leave things out like that one!!! Other people will take one!!! Of course not Chinese lah… Now she studies in Australia and she goes to gym there and she leaves her stuff like that, but no one ever take! You know lah, our people and mentality here… simply take take one… over there is not like that!!!

Last time my daughter leaves her things here, sometimes she forget to take them home. Lucky the maid here finds it and keep for her! The maid here very good one… very poor you know… so sometimes I give her things lah.. you know, like some biscuits I buy that are too sweet and I cannot eat, so I give her loh! They really appreciate one!! These people are very poor one… if you give them so they take lor… and they are very thankful… Like we have a lot of clothes that we cannot wear anymore, I also give!! The maid ar… very poor but very good!”

Times like these, I really don’t know how to converse. How do you tell someone you just met that she is a racist but somewhat philanthropic Chinese? So I tried to make my exit but it wasn’t easy.

Where can I buy a comfortable but not expensive office chair for my home use?

first day at gym

This may sound like a cliché, but I feel like I want to die.

And I’d only been on the cycling thingy for 15 minutes.

So not fit is the understatement of George Bush’s career.

Nemmain, try again tomorrow.

Hopefully without the feeling of wanting to throw-up after.