suanie was great, kthxbai

So Boris Yeltsin died and Russia prepares to bury him. The only connection between that piece of news and today’s blog post is the funeral; even then it’s an obscure link.

I was talking with Serena on some things lost, and had the brilliant idea of listing songs for my funeral. I am pretty sure I’ve done it already, but everyone needs an update once a while, especially if s/he is still alive and there is time to change. For example, if I had listed any of Spice Girls’ songs for my funeral, I don’t want to die anytime soon before I can rewrite the list.

For the few of you reading this blog, I wouldn’t be alive to enjoy my funeral anyway, so you don’t really have to bother. But if you insist, well here’s how I want it to go (since it’s my funeral and I ought to have a say in it, don’t I?)

Assuming that my body was found after I’m dead (you never know when crime hits), I want to be cremated ASAP. That’s right; burn baby burn as soon as my organs have been removed to hopefully help other not-so-dead people. No lying in a coffin for 3 days, no coffin either. Just bundle my corpse with a mat and dump me into the fire; keep the ashes if you want to, but I’d rather you not do that. You can however play some Buddhist chants during my cremation. Not sure how it would help but maybe just for whatever faith left (I’m sure you wouldn’t want me to come back and tell you if it worked).

Also, my most prized possession is my laptop. Hence I want it totally and utterly destroyed along with my corpse. Nobody touches my laptop, EVAR.

Then there is the party, to be held at the last residence I stayed in. Bring your own food and booze. Make sure there’s a lot of KFC original fried chicken and Hoegaarden. No blue cheese allowed.

As for decoration, I don’t really care, as long as there are blown-up photos of me when I looked my best. That would be when I was 15 years old, ask my mother for the photos.

By the way, should I reach glorious heights at my death, Mawisux is definitely not invited to the party. Dream on, bitch.

Make as many speeches and eulogies you want, but make sure you punctuate them with “SUANIE WAS GREAT, KTHXBAI!!!!!”

Now for the most important part — the song list. No bubblegum pop, no Celine Dion, no Beyonce, definitely no rap. To save your time on song selection, here’s what I demand at my after-death party:

01. Enchantment by Yanni
02. Playtime by Yanni
03. When You Were Young by The Killers
04. How To Save A Life by The Fray
05. The Freshman by Verve Pipe
06. Never Forget by Take That
07. Thunder by East 17
08. My Friends by Red Hot Chili Peppers
09. Snow by Red Hot Chili Peppers
10. Run by Snow Patrol
11. The World I Know by Collective Soul
12. Heartbeats by Jose Gonzales
13. Somewhere Only We Know by Keane
14. Run To The Water by Live
15. Come To My Window by Melissa Etheridge
16. Havana Moonlight by Spyro Gyra
17. All The Things That I’ve Done by The Killers
18. A Design For Life by Manic Street Preachers
19. In The Closet by Michael Jackson
20. Starlight by Muse
21. Champagne Supernova by Oasis
22. Imitation of Life by REM
23. Come As You Are by Nirvana
24. It’s Alright by Supergrass
25. Peanut Butter Jelly Time by Buckwheat Boyz.

… and the entire Tiesto’s In Search of Sunrise 3 album.

Man, you are all going to have a jolly great time! Can’t wait ;)

Sekian.

comments

Comments

  1. At my Cremation, ‘Burning Down the House’, by Talking Heads, and everyone has to bring marshmellows on sticks! :-)

  2. If I had the option, my funeral song would be “Welcome to the Black Parade” by MCR.

  3. 05. The Freshman – Verve Pipe
    08. My Friends – Red Hot Chilli Peppers
    18. A Design For Life – Manic Street Preachers
    21. Champagne Supernova – Oasis
    22. Imitation of Life – REM
    23. Come As You Are – Nirvana

    These are my favorite songs. Cool, when you feel like dying, don’t hesitate to contact me, we can die together-gather :)

    To add a few more songs:
    Bittersweet Symphony – The Verve
    Good Riddance – Green Day
    Nice Guy Finish Last – Green Day
    Ha Ha You’re Dead – Green Day
    Light My Fire – The Doors
    Welcome to the Jungle – GnR
    How to Disappear Completely – Radiohead
    Live Forever – Oasis

  4. Is it ok if we just drink through the Yanni?

  5. I would choose “Funeral For A Friend” by Elton John, if I could. It’s a very nice piano piece.

  6. Now, the party idea is a good one :) makes a funeral less morbid (if possible..)

  7. Mine would be ‘I Make Love To You’ by Boyz 2 Men and ‘Can I Touch You There’ by Michael Bolton.

  8. Oh, and there has to be a neon sign pointing at my corpse while those two songs were playing, for the sake of making everything even more tasteless. All casket bearers have to be scantily clad women.

  9. Mine’s definitely Michael Jackson’s Thriller! Hahahaha!

    Off the list, I love:

    05. The Freshman by Verve Pipe
    10. Run by Snow Patrol
    11. The World I Know by Collective Soul
    19. In The Closet by Michael Jackson
    20. Starlight by Muse
    24. It’s Alright by Supergrass

    ;-)

  10. wat about that gin blossoms song you were nuts about, girl?

  11. 25. Peanut Butter Jelly Time by Buckwheat Boyz.

    HAHAEHAHEAHEHAEHAEALMAO

  12. nooooooo!!! NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I heard Got KFC one izzit? where to get one ar? I m here for the KFC only!

  13. No Elbow??

  14. Dabs: i like the marshmellow part. but can prove to be sticky!

    azmeen: i was wondering if i should include that song to my list, then decided in favour of oasis :D

    dylan: death pacts! :D i’ll put Light My Fire to the secondary list in case i rise from the ashes and proceed to die again

    andy: no probs. but those two are fun tunes :D

    Chapree: so sentimental

    xpyre: rock ‘n roll funeral!

    swifty: michael bolton wtf!!! dawn yang will be your casket bearer

    Gallivanter: hmm.. because you gonna have a scary funeral party?

    delia: heh i didn’t forget that tune! but somehow i don’t want it played at the party. don’t know why. love the song tho!

    fa: awesome :D

    wingz: bring your own chicken, bitch :P

    Dr B: hey i only got them last night :D give me another 2 months to revise the list :D

  15. Thanks for mentioning the Manics. I live by them.

  16. EastMalaysianInKL says:

    What? No Careless Whisper, or Karma Cameleon? LOL!

    Well at least you know about Spyro Gyra…NOBODY I met the last 10 years knows about Spyro Gyra :(

  17. east 17?! what?!

  18. You Irish ah? Die already so jolly-jolly one…

    I have been thinking about the song “Hymn” by Ultravox lately, and since you bring up the subject, you know, it might actually work for a deathday ‘celebration’. Anyway, if you have never heard it before you may want to check it out.. it’s an early eighties tune but it sticks with you..

  19. it’s good that your list doesn’t clichedly has songs that sings about death and life and stuff.

    =) 90s baby!

  20. I’d get Tubthumping by Chumbawamba to be played just as the priest does the last rites. :D

    And I’ll make sure there’s a little lever thing which will push my corpse up in the middle of the song and just scare everyone shitless.

    I can just see it now..

    Priest: He was a unrepentant alco…. OH EMM EFF GEE, HE GOT UP, THAT SONG IS FROM SATAN I TELL YEWWWWWWW!!

    :p

  21. Hold a rehearsal funeral. So that we can all come and party :D

  22. Justin: I loved them :)

    EastMalaysian: I know those songs, but i don’t necessarily want them played at the party :P no one around me knows of spyro gyra either until i forced them to listen to their tunes :P

    lishun: just for memory’s sake!!

    suertes: what for want to be so sad??

    S: well now that you mentioned it, some of the songs are pretty sad. but i chose them cos i like them, and not necessarily reflect on my life bla bla whatever :D where’s your list??

    iesnek: remember the glow in the dark stars

    mingsy: but you are not in the country…

  23. Yanni?

  24. mine will include smashing pumpkins’ the end is the beginning is the end… hehehe

    and blur’s best days as the finale.

  25. I’m in Bangsar at momment actually :D

  26. suanie was great = wrong
    suanie is the great barulah betul

  27. What about Kevin Kern’s Enchanted Garden CD?

  28. mad: why not :D

    S: oOoO i loved that SP song!! batman forevaaaa

    mingsy: oO must have mistakenly identified ur ip from the uk… but you were in the UK, kan??

    myhorny: after i’m dead, then have to use ‘was’ mah

    anttyk: never heard, heh

Trackbacks

  1. […] Why not? I’ll even blog about it. In fact I’ve informed my mother and sister on how I want my funeral to be, and my mother suggested that my corpse be burnt like how they do Kenny Rogers chicken. […]

  2. […] But it’s MY wedding, well… I planned my own funeral so I guess I’ll plan for my own wedding day here… […]

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