I bet your nipples that you have heard of Feng Shui at least in one way or the other. Some people think that Feng Shui is all about placing disfigured frogs in some corner and pair of ducks in the other. Some people think that Feng Shui is about walking the mountains, studying the environment, getting directions. Some people think that Feng Shui is bullshit.
Whatever you think, I bet that very few if none of you have heard of Feng Shui Sex.
Now bear in mind that this method is not affliated with anybody nor associations. I know that some people who read my site know where I work and all so the disclaimer here is that, this is purely my own invention.
That’s right. After years of working and studying whatever resources is available to her (which is massive) Suanie has finally come up with a Chinese metaphysical way to improve your sex life. Rejoice, rejoice; there is hope for you after all, my young padawans!
Since it is a newly found method, so to speak, I cannot reveal everything. But I can tell you the gist of it… to create interest what… like how production houses release trailers to spark your interest… there is a reason they call it teasers.
For that reason, I can’t tell you how it works exactly but I can tell you how it will end up.
Feng Shui Sex!
Oh my god, oh yes, OH YES! No move to the North 0.5 degrees! Oh… mmm that’s it, that’s it… Oh fuck me fuck me harder! Wait, North 1 340 degrees now, now, now!!! OWWWWWW!!!!! Oh baby mmmm oh yesss!!! 350 degrees 350 degrees!!! Reach for 353 degrees!!!! YES YES YES!!!! Turn around go South now! NOW! MMM OH MY GOD!!! NO NO NO!!! South 3, 195 degrees you idiot! Yes that’s it THAT’S IT!!! DING DING DING* HERE I COMEE!!!! Come with MEEEE!!! Shoot it shoot it baby SHOOT AT KUN** GUA!!! CUM all over my Southwest 2 baby!!!
Exciting, isn’t it? Aren’t you at least intrigued already?
Now associate that with the person who always goes “AFFLICTIONS AFFLICTIONS AFFLICTIONS” every year on paid TV and you will lose all zest for sex, become a monk hence making the world a better place.
Right. I’m off to do serious work.
* Ding is Yin Fire, also known as South 3.
**Kun is Earth, also known as Southwest 2.
***Yes, I was just kidding.